Old Motherboard writes to all would-be F.O.O.M.s everywhere....

Change your standing in society instantly by joining the world-wide electronic community of F.O.O.M.s..... Watch your status plummet overnight!

Along with becoming a social outcast, there could be hundreds and hundreds of other amazing benefits!

Here are the only four I can think of at the moment:-

• 24 hour unobtainable global help line
• make up your own cardboard badge and say "I am a FOOM" to complete strangers
• as you will be sent nothing from me you won't have any worries as to what to do with it
• be proud to wear what appears to be an anorak and have people point to you in the street

So if you feel you really must become a F.O.O.M., email the Caretaker as you leave Tranquillity Haven. Nothing much will happen.

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All this stuff is copyright © Roger Penwill 2000 and all mistakes are his. All rights reserved. No reproduction without permission

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